Am I alone?

Am I alone?

Dear Dena,

I am trying to be a “trauma-mama” and use new trauma-informed parenting skills.  What I am struggling with is this: My kids don’t respond to me speaking nicely and asking them if they will please go do such and such.  I find myself getting exasperated and ending up yelling (and feeling awful about it) but it simply does not work with my kids. I’m willing to try something new, but apparently my kids don’t respond to trauma-informed parenting techniques.

Signed,

Am I Alone??

Resilience

Resilience

Dear Dena,

I keep hearing from social workers and case managers that “children are resilient.”  What they seem to mean by this is that kids will rebound from traumatic situations and multiple placements and placement disruptions.  I am struggling to accept this and find it hard to believe that kids keep on being “resilient” after so much transition and loss. Could you share your thoughts on this?

Signed,

Hoping for Resilience

Still Grieving

Still Grieving

Dear Dena,
My foster baby left over a year ago and I am still grieving... like my body physically aches when I think about her. I know foster care is temporary. I know reunification is the goal. But I didn’t anticipate the emotional toll it would take on me and my family when she left... or how long the grief would linger. I still feel like I am walking with a limp. How do I get through this?